The time I cut my hair…

Growing up my grandmother always drilled into my head that hair is beauty especially, long hair. I had the nightly scalp massage and comb through to ensure that my hair was healthy and well groomed.

Hair was always a topic of conversation in my household. When I was about to start high-school, I took it upon myself to give myself a fresh look and so I went and took my dad’s heavy-duty, upholstery scissors and chopped off about twelve inches. Naturally, my funeral followed shortly after…

After that I never really cut it. I grew it all through high school and well into my working life. That was when I probably started experimenting. Hair colors, ombres, you name it, it was nice to have an option to manipulate my hair and I always ended up feeling very different too. But I won’t go into that, yall will laugh at me… Lmaoooo

Hair is so deeply webbed into our lives that we sometimes don’t really recognize. I’m a compulsive hair flipper, lol… I admit! I like running my fingers through my hair because, it’s soft and silky. And I love when people touch it too…with permission that is.

I once dated a guy that loved playing with hair. I liked it to. But out of the few relationships I’ve had, this guy really crept up to my soul. He was one of those guys who knew how to appreciate people’s individual beauty and I swear I used to be high off of his vibes. Anyways, as with all relationships with charmers, it ended really badly.

I think it was also one of those really corrupt moments in my life where I started to doubt myself and question my decisions. I also couldn’t tolerate seeing my hair in the mirror. The next day I paid a visit to my hairdresser and I cut it all off…that was the shortest my hair had ever been in my life. (In line with my ear.. )

Did it feel good? Hell yes! I loved how free and liberated it made me feel.

My head did feel lighter and so did my thoughts…

Would I cut my hair off again because of an impression of some guy? Hell noooo…. Yuh girl wiser than that now. Lol

About a year after, I saw Sanaa Lathan in a movie where she shaved her whole head (Can’t remember the name) but that movie spoke to me. I felt it with every inch of my heart.

Hair is physical… It adorns our bodies, shapes our faces, bestows identity etc

Hair is emotional and psychological – it helps create moods, boost confidence and sometimes makes us feel tainted.

Hair is spiritual. It makes us feel complete…it stays with us in our journey…

Hair is all that and more.

Vegan Cheesecake

Soo my neighbour decided to make cheesecake cos it’s her birthday soon, and let me tell you, it was absolutely divine.

She used chia, flax, coconut milk, coconut shreds, cashew cream-cheese, maple syrup. Here it is!!!!

Tulsi Leaf and Cherry Garnish

Red Flags?

Disclaimer! It’s a silly post this time, just for kicks and introspection, if it applies. All characters and situations are fictitious and bare no reference to any of you. Again, if it coincidentally applies, work on your sensitivity… Not everything is about you. Jeez!

Buckle up! Here we go! 😉

Admit it. We are all blinded in the beginning.

1. When he promises to read you to sleep but bredaman doh own any books so he reads you memes instead! (Let me do like Kermit and just sip on my tea and mind my own business yes)

2. When he eats all your fry aloo and then wanna be giving you advice on how to cook it. (After yuh eat it padna?)

3. When he finally sends a message that sounding fun so you decide to message him back only to get a response from his sister. (Mood Kill)

4. When he tells you that you’re the first girl he loved and yuh go to a pool lime with him only to see a big tattoo of the word ‘Kimberly’ across his chest. (Who de hell is Kim? What foolishness you talking?)

5. When is Valentines and he tells you that he stayed up all night writing his heart out… only to find that the first line of the letter says “You have bewitched me body and soul”! Soooo you left wondering if he is Jane Austen reincarnated. (Look, I know you doh read but I do and I know that book.)

6. When he says you are like his oxygen, but homeboy a robot and have many charging bays! (OH yeaaaah, I went there!)

7. When his roti more round than yours and could swell proper too. (Run girl! Save yuh self de shame.)

8. When you smile at him by mistake and the next thing yuh know he by your house liming with your dad. (Stalker much!)

9. When he knows the difference between a MAC Red and SASHA Red and he eh even taste it yet. (Nah boy, I feel yuh swinging…)

10. When he could walk better in heels than you! (Yeaaaaa, same guy from above…)

11. When his last name start with a B or an R, know onetime iz trouble!

12. When he say he doh hit nobody but yuh catch him beating his poor pothound. (Yeaaa girl, you next…)

13. When you are his first crush and girlfriend and he is a momma’s boy. (Just friend zone him until he and his mother goes through a few heartbreaks together….trust meh on this!)

14. When he is like fifteen years older than you and wanna be all up in your zone. (No daddy issues over here, soo rock so!)

16. When he looking like a crunchy kurma – tall, dark and handsome! (Dat guy is trouble, stay away.)

Revelation Three: Quality over Quantity

Happy Carnival Tuesday sweet Trinbago! I’m inside the comfort of my home, curled up on my sofa just sipping on some jasmine tea while trying to multi-task. I’m taking in some loud soca from neighbours on my left and right. Neighbour left is banging out IWER Stage Gone Bad and Neighbour right is banging out some “Do me ah favor doh tell me bout behavior” (look ah doh know who sang it but it’s vibes). Neighbours left and right sounding noisy together but, I dont mind, I feel I hear myself better in the loud, noisy environment.

Anyways, let me cut straight to the point!

I saw my co-worker post this up today. (Hillazz, if yuh bored enough to be reading this blog, ah larging yuh up!! For reading my blog eh… Not for your post 🙄🙄😂😂😂… Kidding)

Now let’s not read men, women and love and immediately narrow it down to elements of romanticism alone OK!

Cos that’s not where I’m heading with this, but well, if it applies its all fine and great, but it’s not at the epicenter of this blog.

1. How hard is it to honestly communicate OURSELVES?

2. Why do we hesitate from doing so?

Soooo let’s take 1. It’s not hard at all. In fact, it’s effortless.

However, wrt 2, I’m not sure I know all the answers. Is it that we don’t believe in our individual greatness? Are we ashamed of our present or our past? Are we trying to fit into societal archetypes rather than being ourselves? Are we being held hostage or under duress?

What is it?????

My mother always advised me to treat my successes and failures in the same way. Being the eldest grandchild in my maternal family, I was always the one that was guaranteed to get interviewed every family lime. School results always made the list! And so, when I failed Spanish (yes, I hate Spanish…. I still do!), I found myself in a very embarrassing position when my uncle asked me my results. Now if it was present day me, I would have told him about how he was violating my right to privacy and negating respect for me as an individual, but it was young me, who was scared that at any moment my mother would have went all Medusa on me in a split second. Sooooo, needless to say, ah had to suck it up and confess my failure!

It didn’t feel so bad.

And to my surprise, their reaction was very encouraging and not shaming.

I guess ideally the hardest part was overcoming the hurdles in my mind and the scenarios that I was trying to superimpose on them. Now, of course I didn’t learn that lesson there and then, it took me quite a lot of similar moments for me to solidify in my mind and within the core of my being, that I must at all times FREELY BE.

Our expectations really screw us up too. Cos, yes sometimes we freely be and then our frequencies are not parralled and then we end up depressed etc. And that’s where we again fall short!

1. Have no expectations.

2. Never define yourself by other’s standards and feel depreciated because of their opinions of you at that point.

3. Always be truthful about yourself.

4. The universe responds to the energy we send out. Release it into the world and watch it come back to you.

5. Always keep it simple.

6. Don’t be afraid or ashamed of learning. Ask questions when you don’t understand people and their points… It’s okay!

I’ve found that the more I’ve expressed my truth the more I loved myself. And the more I loved myself, the more I respected myself and the more people respected me for me..

Now, please keep in mind, I’m not saying I have a fan base eh. There are people that don’t respect me for me and that’s okay… We vibrate at different frequencies and I have also learnt to be mindful of that.

I’m just happy for the five or six people that reciprocated the energy I’ve shared with them. Cos you see, in these instances, I know the respect and love is heartfelt and real and permanent.

For me, it’s never about quantity but quality, ALWAYS.

We Ting: All kinda tings

I was down for a while due to the virus and it kind of got me uneasy because I had such great plans for this long Carnival weekend.

Since I wasn’t ready to give them up, I know I had to do something. I mean yes, my time was surely shortened, but I had hopes of enjoying fully. I’m sharing some of the pictures from my day with the hope that you can also experience some of the wholesome vibes that I felt and fell in love with…

Ping Wing Patch (Close up)
The full patch
Primrose flower on tree. I love Primrose 😍❤️💕👌
Partially eaten caimit
Caimit on grass
Caimit Tree